Meeting My Husband
“‘So, do you want kids?’
‘Yeah.’
‘How do you feel about adoption?’
‘I think it’s great.’
That pretty much sums up our early conversations about children—short, simple, and surprisingly honest. But let me take a step back. Alex and I went to the same college—he was studying missions, and I was majoring in deaf studies. During our sophomore year, we ended up in a public speaking class together. I thought he was cute, but honestly, I didn’t think much beyond that—he didn’t have long hair, piercings, or tattoos, which usually caught my attention.
Then one day, he gave a speech about changing a bicycle tire. He stood at the front of the class, making small talk, then casually rolled up his sleeves—and I thought, ‘OH WOW. He has nice forearms!’ That tiny detail made me (maybe) a little more interested.
Weeks later, I found myself in a random conversation with friends about reading the Bible from start to finish. I admitted I was stuck in Leviticus and thought it was painfully boring. Alex, listening nearby, said, ‘Leviticus is full of good stuff! Look, meet me here every day, and I’ll help you get through it.’ I wasn’t thrilled, but I agreed. And true to his word, every day we met, he made Leviticus come alive. By the end, I was genuinely sad to finish the book. When we closed the Bible that day, he looked at me and asked, ‘So… you wanna read Numbers together?’ I smiled and said yes.
A few months later came our second date. I couldn’t figure out why I liked him—he wasn’t the type I usually noticed. Clean-cut, country boy, zero tattoos or piercings, and completely different from me, a city girl. Still, there was something about him I found intriguing. That night, I wondered if he might want to make things “official.”
Building Our Relationship
We walked through a park near campus, talking for hours—I still love our conversations to this day. Sitting on a bench, he put his arm around me, smiled wide, and asked, ‘You wanna be my girlfriend?’ I was shocked at his certainty and asked, ‘Are you sure?’ He assured me he was, and I said yes.
We dated for ten months, gradually becoming inseparable, learning each other’s cultures, embracing our differences, and growing closer in faith. Our families connected, we celebrated highs and navigated lows, and through it all, we leaned on God and on each other. Marriage was a frequent topic, and I remember one day seeing him in “fancy” khakis and a sweater. I assumed he had gone to pick out my engagement ring—but nope! Laundry day.
Then, on a rainy November day, he asked me to go out to dinner, wearing those same “fancy” clothes. I was suspicious but curious. After dinner, he drove me back to campus, opened my car door, took my hand, got down on one knee in the rain, and asked me to marry him. I gasped at the ring, and he laughed, saying, ‘Hey! You can’t just take it from me! … And, is that a “yes?”’ I smiled and said yes. Thirteen months later, we were married, ready to begin our life together.
Fostering and Adoption
From the start, we dreamed of a family that included both biological and adopted children. We tried to conceive while also completing our foster care licensing, hoping to be ready for God’s timing. Foster kids started coming into our home quickly, often interrupting our plans to grow our biological family. I faced challenges and pain in conceiving, and frustration grew. Yet Alex remained supportive, and together we poured our hearts into fostering and adopting.
One of our deepest desires was to adopt a deaf child, aligning with my passion for sign language and deaf culture. We shared this dream during training, knowing it was unlikely. And yet, near the end of our licensing process, a caseworker called: there was a deaf child who needed a foster family—and maybe, eventually, a forever family. Two weeks before final approval, our first son, Eli, came into our lives.
Growing Our Family
Over ten years, fourteen children have passed through our home. Seven we adopted, three remain in care, and four returned to biological family members. Each child has taught us about love without fear, patience, and resilience. Becoming foster and adoptive parents is one of the most challenging, yet most rewarding, experiences of our lives.
As our family grew, so did our awareness of the state’s cap of ten children per household. Eight years into trying for a biological child, we realized that every child we adopted was part of God’s plan for us. It became clear that our calling was to serve as many children in the system as we could—maxing out our home was our mission.
Now, as we wait for our final adoption case to close, Alex and I are refocusing on our relationship and exploring new possibilities for our family. After thirteen years of marriage, it feels like a fresh start—exciting, hopeful, and full of unknown blessings. Looking back at our journey and at our children, I am overwhelmed with gratitude. Being a mother—their mother—is an honor I will cherish forever.
