We often talk about how much moms sacrifice for their partner’s careers, but sometimes, dads make huge sacrifices too. Five years ago, the two of us, with a newborn in tow, graduated together—him with his bachelor’s degree and me with my master’s.
I’m not going to lie—it was absolute chaos. By that point, we were both completely exhausted. Five months of nonstop baby care, juggling heavy course loads, and barely seeing each other had pushed us to our limits. We were so worn out that we insisted we wouldn’t even walk at graduation. My mom had to practically force us into our caps just for a single photo.
For those five months leading up to that day, our schedule looked like a logistical nightmare. Ryan would attend classes during the day, drive home, hand me the keys, and I’d take over with the baby before heading to my night classes. He endured the infamous “witching hour” with our exclusively breastfed daughter, Lily—who often refused a bottle—doing dad duty when most new dads might have collapsed from exhaustion.
And not even a week after I gave birth, Ryan drove the three of us up to the university. Two of us were still in diapers, yet he patiently stayed in the car, rocking Lily, while I dashed into finals, barely catching a break to feed her in between exams. For two first-time parents, it was overwhelming. But, thankfully, we didn’t know any better—we just did what we had to do.
Our last semester of school wasn’t our finest academic moment. I owe my dissertation passing entirely to a kind professor who took pity on my sleep-deprived, chaotic life. But somehow, through sheer perseverance and teamwork, we made it.
We both sacrificed so much for each other and for our futures. Since then, the balance hasn’t always been perfect—sometimes I’ve sacrificed more, sometimes he has—but that’s the nature of life. Every season brings its own demands. What matters is being willing to make those sacrifices out of love, to support one another, because that’s what partnership truly means.
Here’s to five years since graduation—and to never having to go back to school again!
